Last year, I took a personal pilgrimage to the lands of my ancestors to get clear about whether or not I was meant to become a Mom in this lifetime..
There I was, deep in the heart of Ireland, far from all civilization, lost in the mountains as the wind blew and the rain began to wet the earth and me. The sun was getting low on the horizon, and I began to question myself for taking this hike so late in the day. I’d been wanting to find these Celtic megalithic burial tombs for weeks though, (some of the most ancient burial tombs in the world!)
So, there I was in less than ideal circumstances. I’d already been hiking for over an hour and when the tombs were not where they “should” have been, I went off trail.
If you’ve spent any personal time with me know that my sense of direction isn’t super stellar, even with a GPS I get lost – ha – but thankfully I have great intuition and that eventually leads me to my destination.
The wind and rain was picking up and I had about 40 minutes of sunlight left. In my journey off the marked trail, I found an old ruin. In my mind it was the ruin of a church or place of worship and since I was now feeling lost, alone and scared, I paused to say a prayer for myself. I called on the power of my ancestors and asked them to guide me back toward the trail that led to my car.
I stood in the middle of that church for a long time vacillating between fear of freezing to death out there in the Irish boondocks and trusting that I’d find my way back. Eventually my faith overpowered my fear, and I dropped into a deep trust. My prayer at that point was just to find the trail home, I had surrendered my desire of finding the tombs.
I began to walk in the direction my intuition guided me. Several minutes later, I still could not find the trail, but just up ahead, I could see the tombs.
I crawled inside one of them, despite the waning sunlight. The opening was small, and I had to slide in, like a squatting cat. Then I dropped down, so that I could stand in this small open space.
It was dark inside, but I could see the stones that surrounded me and even more importantly I could feel them. It was as if they were beings that summoned me there to listen to them.
Being in the cave was a welcome respite from the driving wind and cold rain. I sat there alone, in the dark in this ancient burial tomb, way out in the middle of nowhere, with no reception and no one to call. I was a little spooked at first, but then I allowed my sense of faith and love for this land to take over.
I got still, centered, and calm and I listened. I began to feel the essence of Yeshua present in the tomb with me, it felt comforting. A moment later Innana (Goddess of the night) let me know she was at my back. She communicated that she was there to protect and hold me, and that all of me was welcome. Whatever was to come through this experience was of the highest good for all. There was no judgement or criticism in this space.
These two deities invited me into a sacred tantric union. Yeshua at my front welcomed me into yab yum (a tantric position), and Innana behind me created a warm, soft field of light that I could lean into.
I began to breathe, drawing the essence of Yeshua up through my yoni and into my body. Soon I was making love to the spirit of Yeshua, who holds the most compassionate and unconditionally loving energy of any ascended master. I could feel waves of unconditional love and acceptance flow up through my yin meridian (front midline, receptive channel).
I could feel my heart chakra expanding and my whole body warming up. I began to run the micro-cosmic orbit (Taoist Sexology Practice) up my yin channel and down my yang channel (spine). Inanna was behind me the whole time drawing the energy down my spine and out into the ethers. I felt I was a conduit meant to spread unconditional love to all of humanity. It was one of the most sensual and spiritual moments of my life thus far.
Almost a year to the date later, I shared this story with my Living Sexology students. This story really piqued the interest of one of my students who let me know that she was ready to make love to a deity. I was thrilled to guide her in this!
The deity she chose was non-specific, not a certain Goddess, God, Angel or Ascended Master, but instead a white, luminous, radiant being, who was full of light. As she allowed this entity to enter her heart it moved easily and fluidly throughout the rest of her body. Making her spine move, open and undulate like water.
I guided her to feel her feet on the floor, keeping her hips open and strong. Her body began to sway side to side, and she expressed that she was not the one doing the movement. Her throat felt more open and expansive than it had in years and her hands began to move around her head, face, and jaw, moving her cranial bones and releasing years of tension and stress, that had been super compounded by this year’s stress from COVID!
At the end of our session she felt more present in her mind and heart. She reported feeling warmer and more in her body as if all the stuck fluid in her head was now flowing to places in her body, where it’s more needed. She said it had not felt super sexual but that it had felt absolutely incredible and she felt like a whole new person. I told her that making love with entities or spiritual beings can happen through any portal in the body, the heart, the yoni, the throat, Spirit is indiscriminate.
This single session was such a powerful example of how joyful it can be to transform pain into pleasure! The discomfort that had been building up in her body this past year, due to many COVID stresses, in her country, personal environment and her family, and all the build up from so many years before were now a thing of the past. She now knows how to open herself up to the intimate love Spirit has for her, so that she can drop into pleasure.
Which is exactly what I dropped into and experienced for myself last year at Christmas. I learned that pleasure is always at my fingertips and it only takes a single breath to shift my perspective and open myself up to the presence sensuality provides.
I left that experience knowing that it’s not my calling to become a mother in this lifetime. What I’m called to nurture is the people who are already here on this planet at this time. That’s you! I’m called to support anyone who feels lost and confused. Anyone who feels uncertain or doubtful, or anyone who simply wants to learn how to use their sexual energy to ignite their vitality.
I do this with the Ancient Wisdom Approach, which is the approach to life that I offer women and men around the world. It is a deep wisdom that blends the Chinese 5 elements and the 4 phases of the moon. When you know how to use these two systems, that are a part of your body’s function whether you are aware of them or not, you can create a wealth of vitality and sensual pleasure in your body. No matter what you’ve been through or who you are, living your life according to the Ancient Wisdom Approach will have you moving in an upward trajectory. Infused with the unconditional love of Yeshua I offer this wisdom to my clients with love and compassion.
So this Christmas, as we enter the AGE OF AQUARIUS – and experience the WInter Solstice on Monday December 21st….
I want to offer you this:
The season is the same as last year – the holiday music is playing in the stores, the Christmas cookies are baking, the families are gathering (whether in real life or on zoom). But something is off…
The world has shifted immeasurably this year – and that might call for a shift the way you experience this holiday season.
Instead of a consumer driven frenzy, how about re-crafting the holiday around something a bit more…magical?
I invite you to tune in, and create a new kind of Christmas Miracle for yourself.
If you need some ideas – here are some that don’t involve travelling to ancient pegan tombs 🙂 – but can still put you in touch with Source.
Some Magic Ideas:
Sing! – Sing Christmas songs, or sanskrit chants, make up your own songs. Sing anything that makes you feel aligned with Spirit and brings you great joy!
Craft! – Creativity is the essence of sexuality, it’s an opportunity to get curious, to explore, to connect with yourself and others. So even if your painting ornaments for the Christmas tree or baking cookies with your nephews, the creative energy that surges through you and lights you up during these activities, is igniting your sexual frequency.
Kiss! – get under that mistletoe and kiss your Beloved like it will be the last kiss you ever have, kiss you kiddos, kiss you parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles (even if it’s a virtual kiss), kiss your pets. If you don’t have anyone to kiss, kiss yourself, your hands your feet, your arms, honor yourself, love yourself like the amazing person you are. If you don’t think your amazing, think of someone in your life who sees you that way and love yourself from that perspective.
Adorn yourself! – Even if you have nowhere to go and no one to see, get dressed up. Something changes inside of you when you change your outer appearance. Looking sharp builds your inner confidence, so even in times of COVID lock down it’s important not to fall into the sweatpants routine. Dress nice, put on some jewels and walk around your house with your head held high. You will get through this challenging time. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger! A lot of good character is being built among individuals right now.
Pray! – Or meditate, whatever your jam is, be sure not to gloss over it at this time. Keep it at the top of your priority list. My Dad reads the bible every morning – not my jam, but I can see how it keeps him very present, centered and content all day long. I meditate every evening, and chant and connect with Spirit through nature throughout the day. What’s your way? (I would actually love to know your tradition – feel free to email me if you want to share ;). )
Tithe! – Since it is the season of giving, yet many folks don’t have much to give, it’s time to get extra creative with your tithing. You could give a dollar to a person in need or you could give them a smile, a nod or a God-bless. Give them something so they feel seen and acknowledged. Give everyone you encounter your presence, that is one of the biggest gifts you could give.
Light and Love to all of you this holiday season – And cheers to big changes, inner shifts, and all kinds of pilgrimages!
– Dr. Willow Brown